mind your own business

Today the whole family went on an outing to buy new shoes for the toddlers... sounds simple right? From the minute we got to the shops my inner voice was screaming 'abort mission, abort mission!!' and I should have listened to it. Being Sunday the shops didn't open til 10 which from a timing perspective sux. Little Miss is usually asleep at this time but we decided to keep her awake and drag her along. No morning sleep for her today. Missy Moo and Monkey Man can only tolerate shopping for a short period of time and like anything with them, the earlier you do it the better. A late start was a massive hindrance so we were behind the eight ball from the beginning. We get to the shops and there is a queue to get into this kids shoe shop, which still had ten minutes before it even opened. Bloody parents trying to be organised for the return to school!! I joined the queue with Monkey Man who funnily enough was on his monkey leash (animal backpack) while hubby did a few laps with the pram trying to get Little Miss to sleep before the shoe torture started. We waited in the queue, we took a number (yes really) and then Monkey Man proceeded to try and pull every shoe off the shelf and tell me 'get this one?'.... as much as I reckon he could rock a pair of bright pink piglet trainers, I wasn't there to buy trainers, especially not $100+ ones. What the?? Anyway, 20 mins or so in to the wait, and on my 55th 'no' to Monkey Man, all hell broke loose. He threw himself down on the floor and had the mother of all tantys. I thought he'd thrown some good tantys before but this was truly one to remember... Legs and arms flailing, back arching, head butting, screaming DADDDDYYYYY at the top of his lungs and the tears were flowing. I picked him up and copped the screaming in my ear, I told him multiple times to stop it, I showed him the scene in the mirror in an attempt to embarrass him - he's 2, what was I thinking??, I threatened a smack, I told him we'd go home. I could feel my face getting redder, the embarrassment was paramount. Nothing was working and the screams were deafening. Every parent in that shop, and there were alot, glared at me. No one attempted to help me, or distract him, they just glared and the feeling of all those eyes on me, judging, is not one I want to experience again anytime soon. I put him down, got down to his level and attempted to reason with him, which was not easy in a crowded shop. At this point an older lady, a member of staff mind you, said to me with attitude, contempt and tone, 'whats wrong with him???' I snapped in my head, and the words flowed. I responded with 'I have no idea, if I knew I could fix it so perhaps you could mind your own business'. I was so proud! I wanted to tell her to fcuk off, I wanted to hand 16kg of screaming, flailing toddler to her and ask if she could do any better. I had tears and snot all down my shoulder, a red and hot face and we were still no closer to bloody shoes!! I stormed out of that shop and plonked my screaming toddler down 'on the wall' of some random shop and told him I would leave him there and go home if he didn't stop. The tears stopped immediately. Don't know if it was the threat of leaving him behind (a new tactic) or the wall (which he hates!) that did the job and I don't care.
In the distance I heard my number being called. It was a matter of principle now, we'd come this far and I was not leaving without shoes. I marched back in there, avoiding eye contact with every person in the shop and put a whingy toddler on the seat for shoe fitting. Hubby emerged from the centre, I'm sure he'd been having a coffee somewhere thinking how easy this parenthood gig is and wondering what I go on about. Both toddlers were fitted, we chose from the only two choices of shoes available due to low stock and we left. We hurried to the food court to feed the growling beasts in the pram, and exited as soon as possible. All three were asleep in the car, looking innocent and sweet and totally incapable of such appalling behaviour. I wished I could join them, honestly a nanna nap would have been lovely. Instead I had a domestic with my hubby over how it was all his fault, obviously, and we drove home in silence. I'm still mad at him and really it was all his fault. I wonder how many parents who witnessed today's events have since talked about 'that child and his mother'?? Perhaps they too should mind their own business???